Article by Will Newhall, 4th Dan Black Belt and Master Instructor
If you aren’t aware, the blog owner recently made a post talking about how she is stepping away from doing taekwondo. As a fellow taekwondo martial artist I will say…
I commend her courage, integrity, and self-respect in making this significant decision!
I read her post on the topic and wanted to write about my own experience with black belt burn out as well. While I am currently practicing, teaching, and writing, I too felt burn out. A couple of times actually! I thought I might throw my hat in the ring and talk about my own experience with black belt burn out.
I love teaching taekwondo. At one point I was doing it almost everyday! I would go to school, go to taekwondo, and then come home. Rinse, recycle, repeat. At first it was a lot of fun! I loved it! But then it got stressful. It got tedious. It started to feel like work.
I loved teaching the kids and working with my instructor and mentor. But of course, I also had to deal with grouchy parents, whiny children (or adults), and people who simply decided they didn’t like me! There is nothing quite as frustrating as teaching someone who just doesn’t like you, despite your best efforts.
I didn’t know what to do.
What should I do?
Then it hit me.
I realized I could just… leave. So I left. I stepped away for a bit. I ended up returning to the dojang, but it did take time before I did.
During my little hiatus I would go to the local gym, practice techniques, and do some drills. But I didn’t return to the dojang. Instead, I took the opportunity to explore other hobbies and activities. I joined a chess club. A writing club. A Star Wars fan club. It was great, and I felt like I was growing as a person.
Eventually I started to miss my friends and my community. I felt a little sentimental. And I kinda missed wearing a dobok. It’s just so comfortable!
So I went back. But I did not pretend like nothing had changed. Something definitely had. I went back with a renewed sense of self and some boundaries. Not for my colleagues, but rather for myself. Here is what my boundaries (again, for myself) were.
- I would allow myself to say “no”. If I didn’t want to do it, I simply wouldn’t (within reason). For example, if someone asked me to volunteer for them and it got in the way of my schedule, I would say no. This was surprising for some of my colleagues, but they adapted to it eventually. Of course, when I was training and following my instructors instructions I wouldn’t say no! That’s rude, and possibly dangerous for the activity!
- If someone didn’t like me, that’s fine. I simply wouldn’t bother worrying about it. The fact of the matter is, I have no control over what people think about me. Plus, If I don’t have to deal with them, why bother? I like me, and that’s all that matters.
- I would not compare myself to others. Now, that is what fundamentally separates martial arts from other activities. It’s all about achieving your own progress and meeting your own goals. But sometimes it doesn’t feel that way. You can’t help but compare yourself to others. Here’s what you need to remember: don’t. There is no point in it. I’ll admit, fulfilling this one was not easy for me. But it definitely helped me focus and advance my training.
- f I don’t feel like going to training, I won’t. Now, that doesn’t mean I would stop going for long periods of time. I would always make sure to go at least once a week. Exercise is good for you, after all. But I would never do more than I felt I needed/wanted to. That meant that some weeks I did one class, other weeks I did four. Or anything in between!
- Competitions were not jobs. I didn’t need to go to every competition available. I didn’t need to worry about winning. Rather, I chose to go to them because it is fun. I wouldn’t stress over it. I would simply go to enjoy the game. Sure, I won less. But I definitely enjoyed it more.
Ultimately, these boundaries I set for myself helped me feel more like myself. More at ease. And I definitely enjoyed class more.
Everyone is different, and everyone’s journey is different. It’s important to do what is right for you.
Author Bio:
Will Newhall is a 4th Dan Black Belt in Taekwondo and the owner of Taekwondo Tutors. Master Newhall has been in martial arts for over 16 years, and he loves to write. When he isn’t writing, Master Newhall is either training or doing any of his hobbies (that he picked up after leaving taekwondo!).
Related
