A military widow turned profound loss into a decade of service. Now she’s receiving high honors.

Terry Gerton You are receiving a really important award this evening: the 2026 Ted Stevens Award for Leadership from the Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors. That award is really born out of deep personal loss for you. Can you tell us a little bit about your own experience and how you came to TAPS, what it’s meant to you?

Sara Wilson  I’m Sara Wilson. I live in Washington, D.C. here and I’m a military widow. Been a member of the Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors since 2014, when my late husband died suddenly and unexpectedly. My children were ages 2 and 6 at the time and I really felt very much alone in that I didn’t have other peers who were going through that same experience. It’s pretty unusual to lose your husband that young. And so to me, over the past 12 years, being part of TAPS, being part this community of hope and healing where we can share with each other our lessons learned, we can help each other integrate our loss into our lives and be ready to move forward with helping others to go through that same experience.

Terry Gerton The TAPS leaders say you embody the peer-support model that’s at the heart of the organization. What does that look like when you’re trying to create space for, as you just said, kind of honest grief and connection in your day-to-day work with surviving families?

Sara Wilson The peer model — I’ve never been more impressed with a peer model than I have been going through these past 12 years of grieving my husband and helping others grieve their loss. There’s something to be said for walking in the same shoes as someone else. And one of the things we say at TAPS is that grief rewrites your address book. So I have wonderful friends, wonderful family, very supportive. But nothing could match the experience I would have when I talked to a fellow widow who also had young children when their spouse died. And likewise, I’m not a mother of a deceased service member, but I know that’s the way throughout all of our communities at TAPS, whether it’s widow or parent or fiancé, partner, battle buddy, friend, neighbor, all of that, we can find someone to help companion you through your loss. And that’s been incredibly powerful for me.

Terry Gerton You mentioned that your children were 6 and 2 when they lost their dad. And one of the key programs at TAPS is their Good Grief camps. Tell us about the impact that that had on your children.

Sara Wilson It was huge. So my husband died in February of 2014. And three months later, I found myself at the TAPS National Seminar, Military Survivor Seminar. We have it every Memorial Day. I’m from New Jersey, so Memorial Day used to be going down the shore. And since 2014, it’s been going to Arlington and being with a thousand of my fellow survivors. And for my children, it was huge. So my baby was too young to go to grief camp, but when he was able to, when he started, my 6-year-old hadn’t really spoken my husband’s name — we were all just very much in shock. And after Good Grief camp, where she was able have other kindergartners be with her and talk to her about how they were feeling and she could share how she was feeling, and all of it in a very safe environment, paired one-on-one with military mentors. After that grief camp, she started talking about her feelings more. She would say “daddy,” she would talk about my husband. And over the years, she’s now actually going into her last year grief camp, this year she graduates. We have a huge graduation ceremony. And over those years, she has then turned her own experience of sharing her feelings to encouraging other children who come in, as you know, as she’s going through the different age groups, she’s been able to share her own experience and help encourage them to share their feelings. And it’s been huge. She’s also been part of some international groups where we have, you know, Ukraine — Bonnie’s been active with TAPS in Ukraine. So it’s not just with American children, but it’s learning from others as well in other cultures, on how we can express our feelings, how we integrate our loss into our lives. And for children, I mean, it’s just critical.

Terry Gerton I’m speaking with Sara Wilson. She’s a military widow and she’s the 2026 recipient at the Sen. Ted Stevens Leadership Award from the Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors. Sara, one of the features in the award nomination that I read was a remark about your advocacy on Capitol Hill and how that has shaped policy conversations and really some pretty significant legislative activity. What drives you to bring survivor voices into those rooms and what do you hope lawmakers hear when you speak on behalf of these families?

Sara Wilson I credit TAPS for forming a very robust advocacy program that features us coming onto Capitol Hill from all 50 states, District of Columbia, from all over the country, to share with lawmakers about what our sacrifice, our loved one’s sacrifices, has meant. You know, we’re in a post-draft world. And so 2 million people are serving in the military right now, active duty and reserve, out of 342 million people in this country. Our loved ones have earned benefits that they may not be familiar with, that they may be jeopardizing by not supporting certain legislation, or that they may not even be aware of. And so it’s important for us to share our voices so that not only for ourselves, but also for everyone coming behind us, that they don’t have to fight on top of everything else, on top of the grieving and everything else.

Terry Gerton You stepped into some pretty difficult situations, including supporting families after the tragic shooting of two national guardsmen in Washington, D.C. How do you approach those moments when families really are facing their darkest hours?

Sara Wilson I think the most important thing that I’ve learned from TAPS is just to be willing to sit with people in that moment. So I express who I am, what I’ve been through; if they want to ask me questions about my experience that I’m there to share with that, but just to with them. And especially in those initial moments of shock, to be able to be there to give them the basic elements that we need in life: comfort, in some cases food, or, you know, making things easier for them. But just to be willing to sit there with no judgment, and just to hear them and be with them. Sometimes that means more than saying words.

Terry Gerton Well, we’ve got new families who are mourning the loss of service members who’ve been killed in our recent operations in the Middle East. What do you want them to know about TAPs and the resources that are available to them now?

Sara Wilson  I mourn for all of those families and all of us in the TAPS community do. I wanna make sure those families know TAPS is here for them 24/7. Whether it’s going to be tomorrow, whether you’re not ready for a year, whether you are not ready 10 years, we will always be here. We are a family and I would encourage them to reach out to us at taps.org, T-A-P-S.org. We have an 800 number: 800-959-TAPS. Twenty-four/7, someone, not an AI, not an answering machine, someone picks up that phone and listens to whatever it is that’s on your mind. I would really encourage, especially if the families have children and every member in the family is welcome at TAPS. If you’re grieving the loss of a military loved one, TAPS is there for you.

Terry Gerton And as you prepare to receive this award tonight and you think back on your journey from grieving widow to national advocate, how does that resonate with you? What’s next for you?

Sara Wilson I don’t know what’s next for me, but I love that I have an inflection point here to think about just how much I’ve gone through, but also how much I’ve processed, how much I’ve integrated, how I’ve learned. I’ve got two thriving children, which I never would have thought I would have had when my husband died out of the blue. That to me means as much if not more than the award. I’m grateful for the award, I think it could have been given to a million other of us at TAPS; we’re a group of doers. So I’m very honored to be receiving the award tonight. But I have to say, I feel very grateful for the experience I’ve had with my fellow TAPS members who’ve encouraged me and who’ve given me so much.